Oscar

Last night I watched the 80th Academy Awards broadcast, and the one and only best picture nominee that I saw won Best Picture. See what a great steward of my movie-going dollars I am?

My favorite dress? Keri Russell in Nina Ricci. Runner up? Heidi Klum in Dior. Worst dressed? Well, it wasn't the dress, it was the stalactite necklace on Nicole Kidman—the dress by itself was pretty, but that necklace just had to go! And youngster Ellen Page looked like she was stuck in a bad bridesmaid dress. And then there was that writer in the leopard print with the huge tattoo on her arm......

Guys? George Clooney looked very sharp and extremely well tailored in Armani and looked better than his date. Daniel Day-Lewis was wearing ***brown*** shoes to match his brown-piped shawl collared tuxedo—yuck! That's the real reason Helen Mirren is the closest he'll get to a knighthood! LOL And we won't even talk about Viggo Mortensen's 19th century frock coat.

I thought the writers' strike was over. Didn't they have anybody help Jon Stewart with his lame, went-nowhere, attempt at comedy filler? I kept hearing crickets.